My Rainbow Baby

A “rainbow baby” is a baby that is born following a miscarriage or still birth.

“Babe, my boobs have been super sore, I get nauseous and Little M is super clingy but I don’t think she’s sick”

“Wait another week and we will test”

[Couldn’t wait…A couple days pass] PREGNANT!

…..*CRAWLS IN BED* “Babe….”

You see January 1st of 2016 I had pelvic pain due to my ovaries sticking to intestines. Thank you endo! I was prescribed Percocets to aliviate the pain. Mid January I began to feel he pain again so I took a Percocet. Sunday morning I felt an inkling to take a pregnancy test. Well, for someone who has been trying for so long, I had spare tests tucked away. Sure enough, I got the results! Now I’m not the type to get the pregnancy test that you have to figure out if there are 2 pink lines or guessing if that 2nd line is even there. I get the ones that say”PREGNANT” or “NOT PREGNANT” or “⏳” if it got an error for some reason. 🙄 At the time of this pregnancy, I was working full time and we were foster parents to 2 girls 2 and 4 years old. The thought of being pregnant was a thought that came and went.

So I wake up my husband with the test. I cried because I had just took a percocet the day before and because my cycle wasn’t late yet, I had no clue how far along I was or if the pain killers affected my unborn child. I scheduled an appointment with the nurse practitioner a couple of days later. In the ultrasound, nothing was detected but my hcg levels were high and the pregnancy test at the NP office was a positive.

“What exactly does this mean?”

[NP] “You’re 5 minutes pregnant!” (chuckles)

The only image that popped into my head was this one:

See the source image

LOL!!! All joking to the side, I really wasn’t sure what was going on. The NP explained that the fertilized egg was still making its way down to where it needed to be so she wanted to set up another appointment to see me in another week.

Week later and I got to see my fuzzy jelly bean nestled in the position needed to survive!! I cried all over again so grateful God saw fit to bless us again with another chance to naturally conceive. However, my heart remained guarded as I wasn’t in the safe zone just yet. Only 6 weeks along and my mind kept getting flashbacks of my last pregnancy that came to a screeching halt at 7 weeks.

We get to 8 weeks and began to spotting a brownish color. Really trying not to panic but to still take precautionary measures, I go to the ER. When checked, they said baby was fine. The brown spotting was just old blod from the last cycle that just never fully went away but they still wanted to check me in another 2 weeks if no other bleeding happened. The bleeding never got heavier, thankfully, and actually went away. At my 10 week appointment, I was given a due date a week earlier than I was given based off of my LMP (last menstrual period). 1st due date was Sept. 29th, 2nd was Sept. 24th and I vaguely remember being given a 3rd due date but I honestly cannot recall what that date was.

Throughout the pregnancy, the baby was measuring closer to the Sept. 24th date so that’s the date I went off of. I was so sure we were going to have a boy!! After all, my husband was the oldest and my oldest sibling was a boy and his first born was a boy so BOY is the guess I stuck with! Up until 2 weeks into my 2nd trimester, avocados and anything too sweet got me nauseous. This baby was determined to keep me healthy!! HA!

We planned to do a gender reveal at our place, inviting the few closest to us and going “live” on social media so friends and family further away could be apart of it. We bought a rainbow piñata because hey, we are in El Paso, which borders Mexico, let’s get festive!😉The day arrives for my 20 week sonogram. We tell the technician not to reveal the gender and to place the gender reveal into an envelope we brought and she taped it up good. Now we didn’t want anybody we knew knowing before us so we had two of my best friends go to a party store and hand the cashier the envelope and instruct the cashier to fill the piñata up with blue candy for a boy and red candy for a girl. Once done, tape the envelope back up, tape up the piñata and my friends were off. The colors were blue, for obvious reasons but red because that was my favorite color and pink was just so played out with gender reveals. As I finished getting ready, my husband set up the piñata in front of the house, my cousin helped set up the live feed and people began to trickle in and log into the live feed. Being so confident in my guess, I wore a white dress with a blue belt and blue sandals. My husband stood neutral with just white. Now i thought the piñata would’ve came with a stick to swing with but it didn’t so my husband grabbed the metal bat we kept near the front door.

(First hit) Nothing!

(Second hit) 2 red candies fall out🤔 {maybe the cashier didn’t understand you couldn’t mix colors}

(Third hit) Red candy goes flying!!!! {Whaaaaaaaattttt?!?!}

The surprise and excitement on both of our faces was priceless!!!

So from calling baby “him“, we were now saying “her“! Yes, I was that sure. Lol.

I was the only girl and not a girly girl by any means so the thought of having a girl was scary for me. I wanted to be the best Mami I could be but would I?

We were planning a homebirth for babygirl and I was looking into more holistic ways of bringing her into this world. Never would I have thought that one needs to look into EVERY. SINGLE. DETAIL. when having a baby! I was supported by 2 amazing midwives that were incredibly loving, knowledgable and just absolutely a blessing to have had in this journey!! I saw a doctor for lab results but I saw my midwife for wellness appointments. I learned more from them than I did the doctor I would see.

Besides back pain and swollen feet, I was loving my pregnancy!

We prepped what we could till baby girl arrived. Now my mom was set to arrive a few days before the 24th. My mother in law also came down for a surprise visit the same day my mom’s flight came in. A week came and went and no sign of baby. My best sister-friend, who was my photgrapher, had a planned trip to TN, my MIL flew back home and I had my mom another week. We kept talking to baby girl and let her know we were patiently awaiting her arrival but grandma leaves soon so she kind of needed to make her grand entrance asap. Haha! Boy did we have a good laugh on that one because my mother ended up having to extend her stay another week! She was due to leave Saturday, before extending, and I went into labor Sunday!

Got the contractions down to 7 minutes, affirmations posted all over my loving room, text the midwife and she instructed us to inflate the birthing tub! Now I thought I needed to look cute in pictures, so I proceeded to breath through contractions and put on lipstick. Yes this lasted all of about 2 hours or so before back labor kicked in and let me tell you, was it rough! Before going into labor, I was so excited that I would be able to eat while in labor but let me tell you, that was the last thing on my mind!!

The most comfortable position was squatting and the worst was laying on my back. After 24 hours of labor, exhaustion hit everyone. My husband’s hands were shaking from applying pressure on my back, my midwife was tired and my mom would switch places with my husband to give him a break. I nibbled here and there but nothing solid. Drank water because I had to and my favorite thing to ingest were honey sticks! After 40 hours of labor, my midwife called it and said we had to go to the ER because I lost my stretngth and almost passed out. I bawled like a baby because I really don’t like hospitals.

At the hospital, they took my vitals and then placed me in a room. Not long after being in the room that baby’s heart rate kept dropping so they immediately got paperwork started for an emergency c section. Mind you, the worst position for me during contractions was laying down so at this point my hands are trembling during each contraction I got and you want me staying COMPLETELY still for an epidural?! Prayer goes a long way and I had the sweetest nurse holding my hands as they inserted the needle and I received instant relief from my contractions. The surgery team prepped everything and my husband was by my side. Because they have to have the operating rooms cold for equipment my body was shaking how cold it was.

She’s a bruiser”


(Baby cries)

When I say hearing your baby’s cry is the most beautiful thing to hear y’all, it really is!! Suddenly everything I had just endured was nothing compared to holding her in my arms. If I had to do it all over again, I would especially knowing it’d give me my beautiful rainbow baby in the end!🌈

In the real world, a beautiful and bright rainbow follows a storm and gives hope of things getting better.♡

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